Over the last year and a half or so, the same conversation has come up time and again between myself and my assorted mom friends. It basically amounts to these other moms having difficulties (all minor – nothing serious here) with their tween-aged daughters. Not having any female offspring myself, my only point of reference is my own upbringing; and thinking back on what worked with me at my many difficult developmental stages is where I’ve turned to for answers for my mom friends on this subject.
They have been troubled as their daughters begin to change from contentedly playing with the other younger kids and now suddenly start to grow a little awkward and need different care and certainly a new and different kind of communication between mother and daughter as they are starting to become young ladies.
In every instance, I’ve described my Grandma’s old kitchen and how, as I was growing up, she and my aunts and my mom would so kindly welcome me into the kitchen and put me to work peeling apples or helping in some way as all these wonderful women bustled around me, talking and working, socializing and doing. Continue reading
This was a more generic statement that was put to me recently, not specifically a question. A friend simply spoke their thoughts out loud to me, remarking at how wonderfully amenable my child is, and how he does what I ask him to do without arguing, asking why, or whining. So here’s a full explanation of why I’ve cultivated that level of authority, and the lead and follow relationship that exists between myself and my son. Continue reading
When I was about nine, I happened to have a really terrible career day at school.
The guidance counselor came into our class and asked us all, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Basic question, right? We were assigned a writing project to explain our future ambitions, and then “guidance guy” took us aside one by one to talk with us about our career plans.
I was nine. I had no clue what kind of career path I wanted! So by the time the guy got around to me I was really anxious, knowing that what I’d written wasn’t at all applicable to the exercise, but hoping I wouldn’t get in trouble. Here’s what I wrote down that day: Continue reading
This one is short and very much to the point. And in my answer, I have tried to express the point without naming any person or group to ensure that I carry my point without simultaneously demonizing or casting blame, because I really think that most any person can read my answer and instantly understand my meaning, and with reflection, think of at least one person or group who my answer pertains to in their own opinion. So I don’t need to blame specific individuals or groups here. The short answer is sufficient in and of itself. Continue reading